Reinventing Valentine's Day

Ah, Valentine's Day. A holiday of crushes, boyfriends, girlfriends, dates, flowers, chocolates, cheesy romantic comedies, and general goosh-ery of every variety. We see the store displays with the chubby Cupid with his bow and arrows with the heart tips. We see those nasty little heart-shaped candies with little phrases like 'BE MINE' or "I LUV U' on them. We embrace telling out sweethearts 'I love you, babe' or 'You are beautiful!' or if, you're a fundimentalist Christian, 'I enjoy your presence and would like to pursue you with a friendship outing.' Gag. Not to mention the singles that decide to pout and sit around wishing they had a boyfriend or a girlfriend or were married, etc.

What, really, is the point of all this? One day of the year to focus on... romance? Love? What is Valentine's Day really about? I'm about to give you the Linus answer; you know, where Linus on 'Charlie Brown' stands up on stage and tells the Christmas story? Well, imagine I'm Linus, and it's Valentine's Day.

The Legend of St. Valentine is just that - a legend. There's little historical record about him, and in fact, there were several St Valentines recognized by the early church. I think, though, the idea of his story is what we should look at; the man, yes, but more so his message. If St. Valentine exists only as a parable, so be it - the story is still one of the deepest love. Love you won't find in a Hallmark card or on a balloon or in a sappy romance song.

In a time when Christians were being persecuted for their love for Jesus Christ and the life they led because of that, St. Valentine was a brave man. When they could dip you in burning oil, feed you to lions, or just corner and slay you in the street because of your devotion to Christ, St. Valentine saw that as a problem. Legend has it that Valentine helped many Christians escape the harsh torture and even murdering of his Christian brothers and sister, which perfectly exemplifies John 15:13, "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends."

For this, the Roman government had Valentine killed. He died for the sake of the Gospel - showing such TRUE love, and not the sappy romantic crap that ends up on cakes, cards, and Facebook that has been associated with his name these days. What a shame, eh?

Love is a theme that is probably the most profound theme in the Bible. Besides salvation itself, which is basically God proving his love for us, love is an obvious main bullet point in scripture and Jesus' teachings. Love casts out fear (1 John 4:18). Love is patient, kind, doesn't envy or boast, is forgiving rejoices in truth, it protects, trusts, hopes, preserves (1 Corinthians 13:4-7). It is the greatest commandment (Matthew 22:36-40). It is God Himself! (1 John 4:18). Doesn't that sound like something you'd devote a holiday to?

What if this year, we forgot all the generally mooshy and sappy traditions and connotations associated with this holiday, and look at it from a Christian perspective? What if we focused on TRUE love, and not the love of some star-crossed teenagers, a dozen roses, or posting the lyrics of out favorite love songs on the internet? What if we treated Valentine's Day like Christmas or Easter? We complain that those holidays are losing their 'true meaning,' but we still celebrate Jesus at least a little bit on those days; why not Valentine's Day?

Think about it: a day devoted to love! Christian love! A type of love that when you see it in others, you don't get depressed; you are filled with joy! A love that when shared can literally change the world! A love that saved you, and a love that is perfectly exemplified in our God.

The Beatles sang 'All you need is Love.' Switchfoot calls the love of God 'A symphony, a melody, a song...' They also say 'Love is the Movement; Love is the revolution.' Jars of Clay says 'Love is the protest!' Muse says 'Love is the Resistance!' Steve Fee says the love of God 'is better than life.' Now, doesn't that sound a lot better than 'BE MINE' or crappy dollar store candy?

I dare you to look at Valentine's Day differently today! Look at it still as a day of love, but as a day of TRUE love. The Christian Love. The kind of Love God has for us. I promise, your holiday, as well as your life, will be much better when we take that into practice.

So Happy Valentines Day! Love this day!!

----

Also, thought this would be cool. I made a playlist called 'Love Is...' and it has a bunch of great songs, all having some variation of the phrase 'Love is.' Enjoy!

Talking to God

It seems to me, the more I grow as a Christian, as a man, as a friend, as just a person in general, the answers we struggle the hardest to get and the solutions we fight for most are the most obvious. When we get them, we suffer a moment of 'Naw-duh, Sherlock,' and that can make us/me feel stupid and embarrassed, but I think it's something we all have in common.

This blog post has the potential to get very personal with a lot of people, but for the sake of anonymity, I suppose it would be polite for me to be as vague as possible while still having some sort of meaning without sounding like I'm a whiny teenager. Ooh, boy. Specifics aren't important anyway, hah.

I'll begin with a question: Have you ever been in a situation where you had no where to turn to for help? I know what you're thinking. 'I ALWAYS HAVE JESUS, HALLELUJAH - AMEN!'

While that's true, be honest - how often do you turn to God for help? That's what I thought. An embarrassingly small amount of the time, isn't it? I can say the same. Whenever something's got me down, or worse... I can honestly say that sometimes God is the last place I will turn for help.

It seems odd to say that, though. Usually, outside of Christianity, we see people only going to God when we need help, but I bet for a lot of us, as Christians, it's easy to maintain a regular prayer life filled with ins-and-outs, daily 'quiet-times' (sweet child of mine, I hate that term), and what have you, but I find myself never really going to God with my problems or... I guess my heart.

I wrote a little bit about this a few weeks back - about opening up to God. I think that is a major part of it. I haven't been nor have I really ever opened up to God, and I find that when I do, He is able to show me things I'd never expected or things I'd never thought of otherwise.

In the past few months, I've been struggling pretty badly with... life, hah. Things got pretty low at one point - they still continue to drop down there now and again. It got to the point where I was physically hurting myself because, you know, apparently that's supposed to help. It didn't. My doctor put my on antidepressants which have helped a tremendous amount, but still... it doesn't fix anything.

So, I figure I could turn to people. My pastors. My family. My closest friends. I've opened up very little to anyone, and when I do, I find myself stuttering, censoring myself, and never really even releasing a coherent thought. Even talking to the people I love most (they can tell you this and are probably reading this now, hah), I'm very secretive, cryptic, and quiet about what goes on in my own heart.

And pretty soon, I found myself in a situation where there was nobody I could talk to. At all. Don't get me wrong - without a doubt in my mind, God places people in our lives to hold us up, pray for us, talk to us, and help us... but what about when we find ourselves going there first? Instead of having people there as pillars of support, I found myself treating them as a foundation of it.

So, in this situation, I found myself getting deeper and deeper into confusion, pain, sadness, and numbness. What was I supposed to do? Recently, it got to the point where I was, literally, angry at God. You know, like the cheesy Christian movies where the protagonist is like 'God, why did you allow this to happen! It's your fault! BLAH!' But I was basically like that.

'God... why are you even allowing this to happen to me? Why... in all of your ability as God and Ruler of the freakin' Universe, would you allow these little things to line up so perfectly that not only are my feelings hurt and my heart in shambles, but I have no one to talk to about it? Why on earth would you allow me to be so alone here?''

That's when I had my 'Naw-duh' moment.

And it's pretty much a recurring theme in the Bible, especially the Psalms.

"Seek the Lord and His strength; seek his face continuously." (Psalm 105:4)

"Those who know your name trust in You; for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you." (Psalm 9:10)

"Cast your burden upon the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken." (Psalm 55:22)

"In my desperation I prayed, and the Lord listened; he saved me from all my troubles" (Psalm 34:6)

I think that's what He was trying to tell me. I think God allowed me to fall so deep into this literal depression so that I could see, sooner or later, that the only - the only - way out would be to rely on Him.

The Enemy, of course, was hell-bent (pun intended) on making sure that I felt everything that ever happened to me was the result of my surroundings and not the way I was choosing to deal with them. Think about it - if I break my arm accidentally doing something, who do I go to for help? The people I love? They can comfort me and give me advice, sure, but does that heal me? Do I just go through it alone? No, because my arm would remain broken, wouldn't it? I need the doctor, don't I?

It's a simple, Elementary school analogy, yeah, but it's what I've been doing. Does going to God first with my heart, my troubles, my concerns, my everything fix the situations I'm in? No, not necessarily. There's still going to be pain because the attacks of our most relentless Enemy do not stop because we notice him performing them.

I think the most important thing for us... and me, really... to remember is that God is Father, and I am his son. He wants me to come to Him, because he loves me, and is willing to help me. He's willing to just listen if that's all I need. How many times has that happened to you - you're talking something out to someone, and they say nothing at all but continue to let you talk because they know you'll eventually come to the conclusion yourself? I think God does that a lot with us.

The bottom line I want to say is the God listens, and God helps. Sometimes, He allows absolute crap to pour into our lives from every direction so we see that there is no one else that can really help us but Him.

Questions for you now: How much do you trust God? I mean 'trust' in the sense can you really tell him everything, like a best friend... like a Father the Bible says He is? Can you be open to God? He did everything in His Power (and the God of Eternity has a lot of power) to be with you; can't you spare more than a campy ritualistic 'quiet time' with Him? It's something to think about.

As I pray today, I ask that you join me in really just going to God and opening your heart. Forget 'praying,' sit down and talk with God like you have a relationship with Him. That's what Christianity is, and we often tell people that, but act like we don't believe it. 'It's not a religion; it's a relationship!' we'll glibly spew along with every other Christian cliche, but we still pray like God is a stained-glass window image in the cathedral of our mind. I think he deserves and wants more than that. I think I want more that that.

So, try it today. Talk to God. Tell Him about your day. About what makes you happy. About what makes you sad. About how much you love your friends. About how much you liked that movie you saw. About that nasty food you ate at the mall the other day. Be reverent, but fod God's sake, be personal. God is a person. A person who loves you.

Pray for me, too, reader, as I learn this with you.

-Matt

An Obvious Perspective on Prayer

I pray a lot. I mean, I'm a Christian - someone who has a personal relationship with Jesus Christ; of course, I'm going to talk to Him. I pray when I get up, usually when I eat, throughout the day, in the shower, in the car, when I'm going to bed, and in bed. I set aside a special time each day to study His word, and to pray (I... set the time aside, although I'm not the best at keeping it...), but I do pray often. 1 Thessalonians says we need to pray without ceasing, and for the most part I think I do that. At least, I do more than some Christians...

But I had a brief conversation (actually, it was more like a few passing comments) between a good friend of mine, named Whitney that really made me think about how I pray.

First off, a little bit of background. These past few months have been pretty rough for me. I've been really down, I've had a lot on my mind, I've been really kind of sad these days. It's gotten pretty bad at times, too. There were some people I knew I needed to apologize to, to be open with, to be honest with, and just needed to speak to, but I've been finding it hard to be open with... anyone.

If you have a personality like me, you know how hard it can be to be open with anyone - even the people you're closest to; the people you love. It's taken me two weeks before to work up the courage to say things to some of my best friends before - I'm not shy, I just have a hard time giving any bit of my heart to anyone it would seem.

Well, I said something about this the other day - about it being hard to be open with people. Whitney said something that, at the time, I thought was nice, but it wasn't until days later I remember what she said, and my perspective was changed drastically.

She said (paraphrased, not quoted), that she knew how I felt - she has problems with that, too. Then, Whitney said something that seemed like the obvious thing to do, but I realized I had never done it. She said that, really, the only one she felt she could really open up to was God (and once in a while, their little pup that I have a love/bark-madly-at relationship with, but that's not important.)

And it wasn't until a few days later that I really sat down and thought about that. 'Even though I pray often... have I really ever opened up to God?' The more I thought about it, the more I realized... no, I have not.

I realized that most of the time, my prayers could fall under four catergories: Please, Thank You, You Are, I Am.

Please being requests to God, like 'Please keep me safe today,' or 'Please let so-n-so feel better,' or 'Please let me be on time for class today.

Thank You being thanks for what God has done. 'Thank you for today,' 'Thank you for this food,' 'Thank you for providing and protecting...'

You Are meaning praise to God, like 'You are so good God - you are holy, you are the King, you are my lord, and I love you.'

I Am being confession, like 'I am a liar, lord - please forgive me.' 'I am so sorry for rebelling and not being obedient here and here, etc.'

The thing with all these, though, is they are crucial to a prayer life. All four of those things are great things that we are supposed to pray about. But then I started thinking about what Whitney said - about opening up to God.

I'm reminded that God calls us his children, and we call Him 'Father.' I imagine that when I become a father someday, I hope that my dearly beloved children will want a relationship with me because I want one with them. I hope they talk to me often, because I love them... but I hope they talk to me like their father, and not just with please/thank you/ you are/ I am. It's a relationship, but... not much of one, is it?

So last night, I decided that I was going to try praying at least once without using the PTYYAIM format. At first, it was very awkward. I felt whiny and childish, just talking to God - treating him like a father, I guess, was new to me. I felt that some things I'd tell him about were so pointless and petty. Then, I was stricken with a thought.

It was almost like God said to me 'I love and died for your heart, Matt. If it matters to your heart, it matters to me.'

At that moment, I was just kind of surprised and in awe. I really opened up to God. Told him everything. I even cried a bit. I laughed a bit. It was like no prayer I'd ever said before, ever. And I was just being open with the God who knew it all anyway. Wow.

So, my point of this blog is this - try being open with God. Talk to him like a Father - a Father who loves you enough to listen, to guide, to say 'I love you, son,' or 'I love you, daughter.' A Father who is always there, even when you can't sleep in the wee hours of the morning, or when you feel alone and deserted by everyone else. "Oh, how I would treat you like my own children.." the Bible says in Jeremiah. We can trust Him. We can talk to him - really talk to him. He loves us enough to listen.

It seems so obvious too, doesn't it? Most revelations or 'wake up moments' we get as Christians usually are. It just took some wise words of a close friend to get the idea into my head. :)

So try being open with God today. He's listening. :)

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:6-7)

Love & War - Part Two - It Is Worth It

Marriage is worth it.

Wow, isn't that such an odd thing to hear nowadays? How many people on television, in movies, on the internet can say such a bold thing? 'Marriage is worth it.' Worth what, though?

As I'm making my way through 'Love & War,' which was given to me free by the awesome people at Ransomed Heart Ministries, I'm really trying to keep an open mind on relationships, dating, and eventually, marriage. I'm not ready for anything like that yet, and that was made even more obvious by the introduction to this book - even before you got the the first chapter, it was made incredibly clear that it's a fight. It's a battle, and the one thing I think I understood most from reading the introduction was that I have to get my crap together before I want to pursue anything like a relationship with a girl.

John says to a man he's performing a wedding ceremony for as he's at the altar,

"You are about to give your life away. You are stepping up, you are volunteering for the toughest assignment a man will ever be given: to offer your heart and your strength to [woman], time and time and time again, for the rest of your days."

Wow. After reading that, it makes me believe that eloping - getting married in the spur of the moment - is an extremely foolish thing. I don't think I've ever thought of myself in the context of a marriage - a family. Do I have the heart and strength needed to support a woman I love? She'll need that from me. Can I give it to her?

"My words to you today are: it can be done. And it is worth it. To discover that because of your strength (for the guys and men reading) and your sacrifice, [woman] can become the woman she was meant to be - that, somehow, your fierce love can free her heart and release her beauty - that is whatever this may cost to you."

Free her heart. Release her beauty. Eldredge wasn't lying when he said that we live in a 'mythic' world. Those are some significant, epic words right there. That I am to provide my strength and fierce love to free and release her. Like the knights of the stores I used to read as a kid (heck - I still enjoy them). A beautiful, fair princess trapped in a tower, all alone, waiting for someone to come along and rescue her. Do I have the strength and the fierce love to release her - set her free?

No, not yet I don't.

That's why I'm feeling so blessed to have received this book. It's showing me, NOW, before I'm really even thinking about it, I need to be preparing myself for marriage, in respect to I need to 'clean up my junk,' as Perry Noble puts it. I cannot possibly fully offer my strength and love to a woman when I fill my life with junk, and let pointless (or worse... sinful) things clutter my heart.

Today, Jerry Davison, the Creative Arts Pastor at my church, was praying over the marriages in our church and our community (as part of a special day of prayer - you can read about it here), and he said one thing that jumped out at me... but only now, after reading this introduction to 'Love & War.' He prayed for those of us who weren't married yet, and not even necessarily looking yet. Isn't that something? Praying for the future marriages of people - of myself. That's something certainly I've never really done before, except maybe once or twice.

Praying for the woman, someday, I'll fall in love with, and offer my strength to. I may not even know her yet, but my prayer is that she is praying for ME (even if she doesn't know me yet), and that she is praying for the relationship she could/will have someday. That's a very exciting, very scary, very thrilling, very nerve-rattling thought.

Can I do it, though? Am I strong enough? I know I'm not ready now, but will I ever be? Really? Me, the one who can fail at the slightest temptation? The one who was never really taught how to be a Christan, or the one who has never really even had a girlfriend, outside of little elementary school crushes? Can I do this?

I don't know how many single guys read my blog, but this is one thing that John concludes the introduction chapter with:

"By the grace of God, you can do this. You have what it takes."

By the grace of God, I can do this. Maybe not now, but after preparation, I will be ready. Right now, I need to ready my heart for the... adventure that is marriage. I need to allow God to heal my heart, clean my heart, and prepare my heart. I have what it takes.

Wow, huh? I'm not even in Chapter One yet!! This is going to be an amazing study. Keep coming back for more blogging, thoughts, and fun from your's truly, Matt Walker.

A wife of noble character, who can find? She is more valuable than rubies... (Proverbs 31:10)

Jesus Christ Loves Hitler

I was talking with some friends the other night about 'the fairness of God.' The question someone asked was 'You see it all throughout the Old Testament - someone making God angry, and He strikes them down. Then, you see people like terrorists, rapists, child molesters, and they walk around without justice brought to them. Why is that?' That's not a quote, but the general idea is the same.

Perry Noble said once about the same subject, "Don't even talk to God about 'fair.' 'Fair' is you being struck down and sent to hell for the FIRST sin you ever commit. 'Fair' is punishment for EVERY wrong thing you've EVER done. Don't even talk to God about fair." Okay. So... that wasn't exactly a quote, either, but run with me on this.

So, I was thinking a lot about this - 'Why is that?'

The answer was simple - 'Because he loves us, and has mercy.'

Ever really think about the word 'mercy?' It's defined in the dictionary as...

Mercy - a disposition to be kind and forgiving.

Kind and forgiving. To even the worst of the worst? Of course, the bible tells us...

For the person who keeps all of the laws except one is as guilty as a person who has broken all of God’s laws. ---James 2:10

So, sin is seen equally by God, but we're left with the question 'Why?' The answer came to me pretty subtly, but oh so powerfully. It's his love behind his mercy that makes it so incredible.

Take Adolf Hitler for example - one of the most hated, most abhorred, biggest villains of the history of the world. He was directly responsible for the murder of millions of people (God's chosen people, by biblical standards) and was directly responsible for the brainwashing of millions of well-meaning German people (many of the Christians). Why on earth wouldn't God have stricken him down right there?

Because of his mercy and love. Yes, even for someone like Adolf Hitler.

Think of it in this perspective. It's not that God didn't care the Hitler did all those horrible things - it's that God loved Hitler so much, he was willing to give him an entire lifetime to repent from his sin and truly follow Jesus. Did God approve of the things Hitler did - Does God approve of what the nasty people of the world do now? Of course not. But he loves us nonetheless.

God's mercy is not just saving sinners once we put our faith in him - it's giving sinners an entire lifetime as an opportunity to receive the gift of eternal life promised to us in Jesus Christ. Now THAT'S mercy! I know if I was all-powerful, I'd be too selfish to give some people (like Hitler) the chance to accept my offer of salvation - I know I'd be too selfish to send my own son to die for someone like Adolf Hitler. But, thankfully, our God is not selfish. He is loving, merciful, and sovereign.

So, remember that when you think 'That's not fair, God!' Because, really, when we say that, we're saying 'God, don't let your sacrifice cover some people.'

Thanks for reading!

-Matt